It is always worth to feel love
We are running our Breathwork Teacher Training program here in South Africa
It was the beginning of week 3 with a group of incredible souls that are been guide through so much inner shedding
Day after day after day
I felt it was time to make some of the most incredible work I have ever came across to lead
And so
A powerful ritual took place yesterday afternoon
The feminine stood in front of the masculine
Roses and candles and feathers separated our spaces
We each shared about horrible moments of violation received by the hands of our brothers, fathers, partners and demanded our counterpart to take accountability and ask for our forgiveness
The amount of abuse that the feminine has to endure is scary
We were 16 women and we all had at least one time during our lives where we have been afraid of a raging man, beaten up by him, raped or emotionally abused
Always by the hands of someone that was supposedly loving us
There were many tears and much relief as our 5 men listened to us and allowed us to speak our pain
As they each took accountability and asked sorry
The realisation I saw in their eyes was heartbreaking
Beautiful beyond words it was
Thank you for the healthy, new, awakened masculine that can held a woman with the respect and care she truly deserves
*******
Some reflections:
It can be overwhelming
To open our hearts up to yet more discomfort
But the truth of life is that we gotta keep cracking our hearts open until the feeling of love can shine through its fissures
A Japanese tradition glues broken vases together with the use of liquid gold
I like to imagine a broken heart like that
With cracks that instead of scar tissue are made of golden sparkles
No matter the disappointments, the desire to meet the missing piece that seems so far away from touch
We gotta keep loving for the sake of loving
We gotta keep feeling that intense sensation of expansion in our hearts even when nothing comes in in return just yet
Cause love is not a dual thing like they make us believe
Love is universal
It exists in us intrinsically
And it’s worth and more powerful than any other pain or rejection or brokenness will ever be
Listening to our sharing yesterday and after some deeper talks I thought: how is it that we all have an ideal in mind
We all know how we want it to feel like
And it is a craving that grows in time
When we finally feel we have healed and our cracks are filled up with gold
And we are ready to share ourselves fully
The good part is
At least, we now all seem to know what we don’t want anymore
I thought
It is beautiful to imagine life with someone akin
Someone that sees us and respects us for what we are
Someone that challenges us and pushes us forward without breaking us apart
To dream of joined adventures, laughter and visions
But life sometimes has other plans for us
For some of us at least
The ones that walk unconventional routes and that for some weird reasons seem to be destined to do so in all sacred aloneness
But even when so, and even when it is painful at times
To wonder
Will it ever happen for me
To feel so freely and so powerfully and so limitlessly that I can touch the sky with bare hands
Even when the awareness comes
That we have so much love to give and not the right person next to us to receive it the way we would wish for
We shouldn’t lose the capacity to love
To love openly each and every day of our lives and with no particular direction
Because even when it’s not reciprocated
The feeling of love can move mountains
It gifts life and the feeling to being alive
It is life transmuting even when the only thing next to us to share it with is a beautiful song
Or the winds with their whispers
Or some birds welcoming the sunrise
With love,
The Alchemy of Fire
